Hi, I'm Paula Sanderson

Today was a *massive* day for me at work. Follow me on this one.

I don’t normally work on Fridays — it’s normally a “school” day for me, but I wrote my strategy exam last night and I only have one more project that’s a bit more low-key. So I had time to take on an extra project at work. This work project has taken up ALL my brain space. I haven’t thought about anything else all week. This project is going to get posted on social when it’s done so I cannot wait to share it with you later but let’s just say we had some big VIPs on the channel today.

I’ve been thinking a lot about value lately and what that means. Perhaps because “value” was a concept I needed to know for my strategy class — however I’ve been thinking about my own value and the value that I’m building. I work for a public hospital while I’m in school. TBH I’m not making a lot of money doing what I’m doing right now. Yet I feel like the value I’m adding to my life is massive.

I thought about the amount I’ve created today — I’ve filmed over 200 shows so far for The Skoop. That’s a LOT. I’ve had a LOT of opportunities to try new things and I’m growing and learning faster than I have in more traditional TV jobs.

I’m doing *everything* for the channel right now.

I’m booking and arranging guests. I’m creating the structure of shows and doing beat sheets/scripts. I’m setting up all the tech for the shows. I’m co-hosting shows. I’m then striking sets and re-setting the studio. I’m editing the shows for reruns. I’m now even creating the flow of how our 24-hour channel runs creating bumpers, promos, and little host segments. I’m also trying to add in new things and keep up with trends — I’m trying to launch a ‘SkoopTok’.

It’s a lot of work but I’ve never been more creatively excited.

It feels like I’m a channel executive. Then on top of that, I just finished semester one of my MBA. I’m now understanding the theories of strategy. I feel validated. I feel legitimate as I make my long-term strategic plans. Sure I’m extremely susceptible to imposter syndrome but I feel like I’m adding tools into my kit that will help fight that feeling and give me the armour I need to take up space.

I know that I’m building a foundation my whole career is going to rest on.

I’m also making a LOT of mistakes in the best way possible. When I host, I trip over my words all the time. When I attempt to sound mix, I know I’m way off. My directing style needs work. I’ve got a list of things that I want to create and my ideas are constantly evolving.

Today’s guest did not go the way I wanted it to. I left the show feeling deeply disappointed. My idea was great but the execution did not go the way I wanted it to. I know what the vision was and it’s so frustrating when I don’t nail it.

Here’s the key – my taste is there and getting stronger daily. I’m like “UGH I know this could be better” and while I hate that feeling, I also need to remind myself that I’m chasing something good here. I know what the standard should be and that’s better than what a lot of people can say. I don’t settle for “enough”.

What I’m trying to do now is put my 10 000 hours in so that I can get my skill up to my taste.

Like I said up top, since joining The Skoop team in April, I’ve created over 200 shows. That’s wild. I will hit 500 by the time my contract is up for renewal in April. I also know that I’ve created at least 50 shorts and there are going to be so many more… because I’m starting to create a factory line to make new content to go alongside our ‘live’ shows.

Every edit I do, I get faster and better at the basics. I now want to push my skills — I want to spend time on YouTube tutorials and figure out how to make my visual ideas come to life. Perhaps Aftereffects and procreate are in my future because I love blending animation and live-action.

I also have a lot of freedom right now. I’m building a creative hub for kids and their families in the hospital. They are a perfect audience. I can have fun, make mistakes, and try new things because we constantly have new viewers.

I feel like I need a constant “mess is good” reminder.

Today’s show had tech issues. Our sound was off. I couldn’t hear what was happening so I kept talking over people. One side of my brain is completely devastated and frustrated that it didn’t “work”.

I know that I’m a perfectionist – I’m really trying to fight that right now. I’m really trying to just get things done and make enough things that I can get to perfect. I know I normally slam on the breaks right before I hit publish or launch because I feel like I’m not ready. I’m constantly fighting imposter syndrome. I’m constantly feeling like a fraud.

The other side of me is going – we tried something different. We had done the same style of show for years and for the first time ever we tried something new. That’s good. I took a risk. Taking risks is good.

My little new years resolution for 2022 is to be more like Miss Frizzle: “Take Chances Make Mistakes and Get Messy!”

Building value is building experience.

I also know… I can always fix it in post 🙂